710

701. The best analogy to explain the concept of prepaid, postpaid, and unlimited is by using the terms call girl, girlfriend, and wife (unless unlimited has network issues).
702. Your mama is so fat her patronus is a pie.
703. With birth comes the inevitability of entropy.
704. Dear coke, You're just over reacting. Sincerely - Mentos.
705. Even if you don't eat organic food, you end up delivering an organic baby.
706. I am procrastinating so much that the personal things to do needed to take a personal leave will happen only in the weekend.
707. Researchers are those who talk about their work among themselves, unconsciously seeking the synergism that made ideas sprout like weeds in the disordered garden of the laboratory.
708. "My mom is going to kill me", said the pregnant teen and her foetus at the same time.
709. Mr. Policeman, can you puhlease polish my Polish shoes?
710. In the name of the father, "daddy", in the name of the son, "daddy's boy", and in the name of the holy spirit of Harvey milk, San Francisco, go and sin more.

700

691. Aliens fricking can't contact us coz of all the noise from space junk.
692. The grass is always greener in the Easter basket!
693. Imaginary numbers and inequalities don't exist in mathematics. Then how come this inequality is a common term "i<3 u"?
694. Aliens fricking can't contact us coz of all the noise from space junk.
695. Yet another reason that I fall under the category of geekdom "Z = x*x/a*a - y*y/b*b; The hyperbolic paraboloid equation that defines the shape of a Pringle"
696. If February can March, April May too.
697. Easter made easier with just a letter change.
698. "Uh Oh! I shouldn't have ordered the pay per view for the royal wedding using the real name", Osama's last words.
699. With great power comes a big fat electric bill.
700. For some weird reason, it's easier for me to fall asleep in a seminar than in my bed.

690

681. If you're not dreaming, you're just sleeping.
682. I wonder what all that fuzz about a 'superb owl' (superbowl) was on?
683. I lived, I loved, and with that comes a certain amount of wisdom and cramps!
684. Overkill is just underrated.
685. Is there a person in China called "Too Young" who is too old?
686. Without bears the world would be unbearable.
687. I did not punch him. He head butted my fist. I swear!
688. Well, my Lego Rome was built in a day.
689. Life was much simple when apple and blackberry were just fruits.
690. Sometimes life throws you a googly and you just don't know enough about cricket to finish the metaphor.

680

671. I have the right frame of mind. But I'm lacking the big picture to fit that frame.
672. If you can open all doors in your life, then do apply for a Janitor's position.
673. If you wanna last longer in bed, buy sleeping pills.
674. The next time someone serving food is going to ask if raspberry tea is ok for the sweet tea I ordered, I am going to reply, "Is monopoly money ok for real money?"
675. Let the accelerated mass be with you.
676. My brain is growing out of proportion and that my friend is the reason I have a receding hairline.
677. Soup of the day - Bourbon!
678. "Does your contact lens have issues? Then try our contact lens solution...." Ain't this a marketing quote? ;)
679. Laughter is the worst medicine when it comes to broken ribs.
680. My brain is growing out of proportion and that my friend is the reason I have a receding hairline.

670

661. My clock goes from 0 to 60 in 1 minute.
662. Once I was a coke addict. Then I switched to Pepsi.
663. Whenever a friend misappropriately asks about how good his selection of a wife was, my response would be, "She is one extremely beautiful lady with one horribly impaired vision"
664. Oh yeah! You've got three.... My fan has four settings - Slow, Medium, High, and......... OFF!
665. I wonder if Wikileaks has "Santa's naughty and nice list" so that I'd know if I get a gift this Christmas or not.
666. I believe in the dark knight coz only a Mr. Freeze can make a December this frozen.
667. If an atom and its constituents has mass, then I'd hope they had a good Christmas.
668. I had to rip through four layers of a boxed Christmas gift wrapping to find out that my gift was a DVD of Inception.
669. My resolution to stop procrastination is going to start from 2013. Happy 2011 everyone.
670. 2010 is in my top 10 years of the last decade.

660

651. One way to avoid making wrong decisions is by not taking one. But the one problem is that this is also a wrong decision.
652. Today's procrastinators are tomorrows proactivists.
653. The Tamil version of 'Adava Kedavra' would be "Ava Kedakura"
654. Sometimes, life is like a passage through a museum. All you can do is observe the beautiful masterpieces. You cannot touch them.
655. Dear customer support, I would like to first bring to your notice that I am typing this message with my middle finger.
656. FYI - It takes the same amount of energy to change an "energy saving" light bulb as that of a normal light bulb.
657. It's called the human "race". Got no other option but to run for a win.
658. When a ballerina dances on her toes, I just wonder why not hire a taller girl or better, give her heels?
659. At times I feel that my certain mental disability should fetch me parking at the disabled lot.
660. When the doc asked if I knew about my RBC count, I frankly told him that I never knew that they were that smart.

650

641. Some family trees are pretty funny. The academic sibling would now become my academic niece.
642. There's no Z in insomnia.
643. Thorium Indium Potassium my dear Nitrogen Erbium Deuterium.
644. Last week was candy day. Soon it will be turkey day followed by egg-nogg week. And finally there will be ham day. Don't you see why America has a high rate of obesity?
645. I am suffering from post-occupational trauma and boredom.
646. Hope and blame - the two sides of the surviving coin!
647. The biological clock never snoozes.
648. Well at least for the sake of defining character, I've got to do something crazy!
649. The two sensible words that can open a lot of doors in any person's life are push and pull.
650. Gave up to give in.