Friday, September 24, 2010

640

631. Pouring milk in the glass was fine. But pouring orange juice into the cereal bowl just proved that I'm focused in not being focused.
632. Thanks to my mom I don't have the specific skills I needed the most from my dad. Damn genetics!
633. I am a total rascal. People get disappointed if I don't do the wrong thing.
634. Chugging 4 gallons of milk in under a week should qualify milk as a staple food during dissertation work.
635. "Your mama's so fat that she faces an increased chance of a cardiac arrest and type 2 diabetes" - Now ain't this a concerned curse??
636. When life gives you lemons, decode its genome and genetically modify it to produce apples and oranges.
637. I have an open door policy. So opportunity don't knock, just walk right in.
638. To the few dreams that turned into mere lies.
639. Having trouble sleeping to snoring. No worries. Just attach a mouth organ to their face, and they'll wake up the moment they hear the organ blare.
640. Choosing the best answer in life does really suck.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

630

621. Here's an idea - Why don't we just stick a note that says "Warning: Subjects in the mirror appear fatter than they appear" and save the tension of lying?
622. The shortest distance between two points is definitely not the shortcut my dad used for driving back in my childhood days.
623. Life is much more fun with strings attached. At least that's what I felt when I bungee jumped.
624. Five fall semesters ago they were hot fresh(wo)men. Now my eyes see them as just teens.
625. Men have an unique ability to forget, while women have the greatest ability to remember.
626. Thanks to all the wee hours of work, my throat is infected and it sounds like an asthma patient blowing the vuvuzela in a freshly mowed pollen field.
627. Considering the time at hand, I'm not entirely utilizing my rights to freak out and get cracked at!
628. Noooh! NO! I'm not getting reeled into that good cop-mom business.
629. Finally.... I've reached the 1 gallon mark of donating blood.
630. I am going to bed coz the girl in my dreams desperately needs an Inception.